Greetings on this soggy day, my friends! It’s hard to believe but my third week is now in the books. So far I’ve lost 8lbs and that’s just with changing the way I eat. This weekend, I’ll finally get to make my way to the VitalSigns gym. I had planned to go on Tuesday night after work but ended up with migraine that left me in the bed all day. With church on Wednesday night and Living Christmas Tree practice last night, I decided this weekend would be a good time to get in there and get familiar with the gym. The plan is to just use the treadmill for a few days and then Terri, our wellness nurse, is going to help me come up with a plan! I’m excited for this next step. I’m so close to 10lbs that I can hardly stand it. 🙂
This week has been a harder week physically for me thanks to the weather. Today, I just feel “blah.” I’m aching but that’s to be expected with a cold rain. I’m finding that night time is my hardest struggle now, while I’m not tempted to eat, it is when I “feel” the most of my emotions for the day. I don’t know if that makes sense but I’m most vulnerable at night and feel things most deeply. I’m horribly honest at night too and way too gutsy as well. I used to have friends who would joke that they would wait to call me at night to find out things because that’s when I would reveal the most about myself. Of course, it may very well be that at night when I’m in the safety of my own home is when I finally let my guard down and experience varying emotions. Before this new journey I would occasionally grab a bite of chocolate or something sweet on my way to bed … it was comforting. Now, I just lay there and face the end of the day. I review the highs and lows of the day. Read my “Jesus Calling” and “Streams in the Desert”. Pray and repent over things that need to be changed in my life. And eventually fall asleep. I’m tired today. =)
I feel like this day could either way. I do not allow myself the luxury of crying for just any old reason so if I make it through this day without crying I’ll be impressed. Even though, this is truly a most beautiful season I am surrounded by a lot of heart ache and uncertainty with friends. Several dear to me are struggling with recent job losses, health issues and ever increasing medical bills, threats of bad weather, dreams that seem to be pulling further away and many dealing with the loss of loved ones. I hurt for them. But I’m trying to remember what I read last night in “Jesus Calling” because it talked about stepping aside in your day and acknowledging “Surely the presence of the Lord is in the place.” It’s in that moment that you are reminded of Who you have with you. It is a way to recommit the day to the Lord.
I’m not tempted to eat. Giving up that desire has been fairly easy. The temptation I face today is to not give in to these depressing feelings. Instead, I am going to choose joy. I am going to turn these dear friends and loved ones over to the Lord because He’s the only one who can handle these issues anyway. And when I am “prone to wander” back in to my worry I’m going to claim these verses …
“You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!” Isaiah 26:3
“You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever.” Psalm 16:11
“Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.” Psalm 55:22
I hope you are doing well this week. Thank you for joining me on this journey. It is a blessing to not walk this road alone. I’m excited to see what’s in store for this upcoming week. There’s only 9 weeks left. Time is certainly flying by. I pray you have a wonderful weekend.
Blessings …
– Melody
good job melody I am so very proud of you!!!!!! you are so inspirational and loving. Keep up the good work!! let me know if you need anything.
Congratulations sweet girl! You are making important and great strides. Yes our emotions are what cause us the most “pain, struggle and temptation.” They are what lead us to human highs and lows but as you mentioned, Jesus wants to be first in all things. He wants us to allow Him to take captive all our thoughts and feelings and He wants to fill us with Himself. He cared deeply for people but it never replaces His peace and joy in the moment. Evenings are difficult whether you are at home alone or in a room of people if your heart is searching. Let your search (my own heart is convicted by what I’m saying) be filled with His face, His hands and His eyes. All these things are pure love, pure joy and pure contentment for you Melody Faith Mullings as is His plan for your life. Love you!